Motivation & Disease

I have none right now. It's probably going to hurt me this semester. My problem: I'm just lazy. I say that because I have no excuses for my lack of motivation. But really, I'm just tired... all... the... time. Tired to the point that, if I didn't think I'd stay up all night, I could sleep all day. I could stay home all day, stare at the dishes and laundry, and not touch them at all. (What a good wife I am...)

In other news: I can actually feel Baby Girl moving around. I think it's been a couple weeks since I started being able to feel her sloshing around in there, but since I am very inexperienced with this pregnancy thing, I didn't realize that's what it was until I realized that's what it had to be. It was too low to be belly grumblings, and it definitely didn't feel like gas. Too much information... I know. Anyway, I couldn't be more thrilled. I was waiting for it excitedly.

I also have a bunch of friends that are pregnant too and due about the same time I am. Most of them are about to find out the gender of their babies. I guess I'm pretty lucky I got to find out so soon. I'm counting my blessings.

On ANOTHER note: my sister called me almost frantically yesterday. I got a call, then a text telling me to call her ASAP. She doesn't do that unless it really is urgent. I called when she was in the car on her way back from taking her almost 5 year old to the doctor. Apparently she had just been diagnosed with Fifths disease. It's about as bad as Chickenpox for a kid from what I had read. Sometimes they'll get a fever, but mostly it involves some mild symptoms followed by a rash that looks like they've been slapped. Not so bad for a kid, but it can be really bad news for a pregnant woman in the first half of her pregnancy. If you've had parvovirus before, you're probably immune. But most people can't remember if they've had it before. Thus the precaution of getting blood work done. So that's where I am. If I did catch it and I'm not immune, it can cause anemia in Baby Girl. And as most of you know, blood is pretty essential to a developing baby. My doctor didn't seem too worried when I was talking to him. I guess they have things they can do if I am infected so Baby Girl doesn't die. That gives me comfort. I'm not too worried anyway. Mostly because I'm just not. (That's the benefit of having the Spirit with you I guess. Even when things could normally cause you to worry yourself sick, the Comforter is there to calm you down.) I've been getting mild headaches today, which is unusual for me. Supposedly it's a symptom. But then again, knowing myself, it could easily be psychosomatic. I told Cory I had headaches today and he rolled his eyes. That was annoying. I told him he wasn't allowed to roll his eyes, even if it was all in my head. A headache is a headache. Obviously HE'S not worried either. Still, a little compassion, just in case, would be nice. Besides, this is HIS kid too.

I went and had blood drawn this morning. Missed work. Didn't go to classes I didn't feel were essential. I have one teacher with an autoimmune issue and gets sick pretty easily. She told us not to come to class if we were ever sick. I didn't want to risk it. Maybe that's me justifying not going to class. Really, I feel like my true intent was keeping her safe. Either way, I have to make up the work. That wasn't supposed to be the point of this paragraph... the point was that they couldn't find the lab request when I went in. They drew blood anyway and said they'd find it. Ha! I called a few hours later. They had the request, were running the labs, and they'd know something in a day or two. I'm hoping sooner rather than later. Again, I'm not super worried, but I would feel better knowing. And I can stop giving my hypochondriac self headaches.

I've just been taking things one day at a time these days. It's all I can do to keep from sleeping my days away. I can't seem to think ahead more than another day or two... if that. Hopefully my motivation will spring back into me. I think I just need to get an awesome grade on an exam or something to show me I'm decent at anything. Maybe that will motivate me. Maybe I just need to pray a lot more to help me get through this little slump I seem to be going through. I think I'll try that first. Add some walking into my routine again. Go out and see people again. I need something more immediate to look toward. Something I actually have time for. (I work every single day this entire week... including Sunday. Suck.)

P.S. I did wash dishes (both at home and at work) yesterday, and washed a load of laundry today. It is yet to be folded... but I did it.

Hey Baby!

I have been so anxious all day today.

Yesterday I had an appointment with my doctor. We got to hear baby's heart beat again, which he didn't tell me what it was. But everything sounded good.

Today I had an appointment at the hospital where I am participating in a new mom (pregnant lady) study. They're trying to find indicators for birth defects, low birth weight, and pre-term labor. Things of that nature. Anyway, today at my appointment, since they do ultrasounds at each appointment and I'm 17 weeks, we could find out gender. I know a lot of people like the surprise, but Cory and I wanted to know. Badly. Once we have one of each, we might let it be a surprise.

I also found out that Cory has been really excited about finding out what the baby is. It took hearing how excited his co-workers were (directly from them) and having them tell me that they've been hearing about it for a LONG time. He's pretty good at keeping cool. I think part of it is that if we're both too excited at home, we'd never get anything done. I really did love hearing from his co-workers that they were excited for us. It made some of those long days seem less stressful. (My husband works with some pretty neat people.)

Well, without delaying any longer, here are the results of our ultrasound:



Hello June Bug! We look forward to meeting you this summer!