I Hope They Call Me On A Mission

My new little brother (new because he's my brother-in-law) just turned in his mission papers on Thursday. It's kind of exciting to me. I guess we have a brother on a mission right now, but he's coming home in November, and I've only talked to him on the phone... so I kind of feel bad but I forget he exists sometimes. Yep, I'm a jerk sister.

I'm really excited for Parley to get his mission call. We made our guesses. To make it official for everyone outside the family, I'm guessing Texas, or Chili... Cory is guessing Louisiana or El Salvador. (In his family you get one state-side guess and one out-of-states guess.)

It makes me think back on my own mission and how neat of an experience it was. I even ran into an Elder from my mission yesterday. In fact, he approached me asking if I remembered him. I didn't... but that's really because he served in an area I was in just after I left. I was amazed ANYONE remembered me at all. That felt really good.

I'm proud of Jared who is serving now, and I'm proud of Parley who will probably be leaving for his mission in the next few months. I hope that the next 4 brothers in line will follow suit and that Hyrum will also decide to serve the Lord in this capacity. It is a huge blessing and opportunity for them, family, and friends.

And just so everyone is aware, I will now have a brother or two serving a mission for the next... close to 10 years. So neat!

It's just so great because, besides my dad, I am the only one in my immediate family who served a mission. So I get to finally help little brothers prepare, etc. I get to tell him to be nice and look up to the example of the Sister missionaries. Because... well, there are a LOT of elders who didn't like us just because we were girls on missions. Sad, right?

I am grateful to all the young men and women choosing to put life aside to serve the Lord. And I'm grateful for my husband, whom the Lord trusted so much to give the experiences he had on his mission, who also decided to serve faithfully.

I know the Lord is continuing to bless us.

The End

I realized I still haven't written about my last week of EFY.

My last week.

I will say it was completely bittersweet.

I had another group of 16 & 17 year old girls. This time we had two groups of boys. So that was super fun... and frustrating in its own way. But I still loved them, as I always do.

I had two girls that struggled with anxiety. I was able to bond with one of them really well because of it. But this was no small anxiety. Her anxiety attacks, standard, were the same and the worst one I ever had. (I think, in a way, my anxiety attack a while back was a blessing to help prepare me for this girl. Everything has a purpose.) This girl, her life is hard. She's the only member in her immediate family, one of her parents is an alcoholic, she's the only youth in her ward, and the only member in her high school. Granted, I was never as physically isolated as a member, but I sure felt a lot of social isolation. We were pretty much best friends by the end of the week. At least I felt that way.

I felt like I wasn't really able to sit back and enjoy my last week partially because of the anxiety issues. But at the same time, it also allowed me to relax and see it from a different point of view... and let the boys take over.

I can't really remember most of what went down that week. I remember being really frustrated at one of my cos because he was a goof-off and I felt like he was more there to entertain and be given attention than teach.

By the end of the week, I was so grateful that I took the time that I did have with my youth to share my testimony with them. Most of them actually left me notes of gratitude, sharing what they learned and sharing their testimonies with me. It was awesome.

I even had a non-member in my group, which I had never had before.

I had the step-sister of the session director's wife in my group.

I had a girl whose dad was dying from some nerve disease that was causing his brain to decay.

I got to teach about families again. :)

It was an amazing week that strengthened my testimony that everything we experience can be for our good and the good of others. It strengthened my testimony of eternal families.

I just love EFY, and I can't believe I'll never work as an EFY counselor ever again. But I have been blessed. No doubt about that.

This Is My Confession

I confess... I am a crybaby.

Cory and I went to the SS office last week to get my name changed, and as we were sitting at the counter, I started to cry. I think it started when my name was too long to put into the forms and I had to make a choice. "Kayla Danielle Merriman Scott" was not going to work. It's one letter too long. *sigh* I know, I'm crazy. But I want to keep all of my names. "Kayla" wasn't going anywhere, obviously. Unless I wanted to be radical and change my whole name to something like Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock. (Those of you who watch the show will get the joke, but I think the point is still valid.) I didn't want to give up "Danielle" either because throughout all of high school, I had an identity crisis and went by Dani instead of Kayla. And, I know most girls are so willing to give up their maiden name as a symbol of accomplishing their life goal of getting married. But I'm not most girls, and I really, really LOVE the Merriman name. It ties me to my family. Or at least that's how I feel about it. It's one of the few things that I share with my brother, and what tells people I am my father's daughter. I have an unnatural attachment to my father. Not unnatural in a bad way. But the man raised me. I guess, subconsciously, I wanted to pass on his name to show the world how much I love and appreciate him and all of his sacrifices. (I can't leave my mom out, she has done a ton in the past many years, and especially for the wedding, to make sure I was alive and well.)

So I had two options, since Kayla Danielle Merriman Scott was out of the picture. Ultimately, I had to make a sacrifice. The government always crushes your dreams, right? (That was a joke...) After the deal was done, I signed the paper, and we walked away, I cried again. And again when I saw my name on my shiny new SS card.

Even in church, when people call me Sister Scott, it still doesn't feel like me.

I confess, I also cry everywhere else.

Any time I hear my husband singing and playing a love ballad, I cry. Well, to be fair, sometimes he IS singing directly to me. And sometimes we sing together. Just because we're like that.

I cry when I pray, thanking my Heavenly Father for my wonderful life, families, blessings, learned lessons, moments of inspiration or opportunity...

I am a crybaby.

L.O.V.E

After almost 8 months of being engaged, Cory and I finally got married!!! Yep! We did it! And it was the most beautiful experience ever. Never have I felt the Spirit more strongly than when I knelt across the alter in a temple of God to be sealed for time and all eternity to this man.

I'll admit, not having a car for the entire week before the wedding and not having everything finished until the night before really did stress me out. I got maybe 4 hours of sleep on Thursday. But, it didn't matter. Everything turned out beautifully. Cory had to put up with my venting here and there, but I'm sure we'd both rather me let it out than keep it in.

Also, for those of you who left early, you missed Cory singing to me. He arranged the last two verses of a song just for me. I love him so much!!!

I'll try to post some pictures soon. Well, once I get them, you'll see them.

We spent the rest of the weekend at family functions. My parents got us a hotel in SLC, which was great since we'd have to do a lot of back-and-forth driving otherwise. Gma Scott's 90th birthday bash was a huge success, and Kelli and Kristy's baby blessings were just wonderful. They even asked Cory to participate, which really meant a lot to me. I am so grateful my family loves him. My brother, Matthew, even approved, though he only met him the night before the wedding. That meant a lot to me too. I am just so grateful for all of the support of our family and friends. This weekend would have been miserable (except the temple part) without everyone.

Last night we headed up to Park City. Gma & Gpa Parker have a condo up here that is just lovely and became available for us last minute. So we get to spend a couple nights up here for a honeymoon. Cory cooked me breakfast this morning, so I'm making him dinner tonight.

I am mostly so grateful that the Lord has blessed me with such a wonderful and talented husband. He has filled my life with so much joy over the past year and I am so excited to see what our future holds!

Time of My Life

I guess now is as good a time as any.

I haven't written about the rest of EFY yet. Mostly because I've been really busy. I should have been really busy today too (SO much planned and so many errands to run!), but my car decided not to start again. So instead of doing all the things I had planned, and because I don't so much feel like being out in 90 degree weather, I'm stuck in my apartment. At least my apartment is mostly cleaned and organized. Just about ready for Kayla to come and for Cory to come home to. Maybe my car not starting is a blessing in disguise... so I can get a few other things done and relax a little before a truly crazy week. And by "other things" I mean studying for my bio final I need to take before I get married so I can start my math class...

I still need to finish week 1 of EFY also. Yeah, about that...

Can I just say that working EFY has been one of the most rewarding jobs of my life? Well, that is up to this point. I'm sure motherhood will be just as exhausting and probably a little more rewarding. Especially since they'll be my own children.

Random pause: my new neighbors apparently have no consideration for others since their music has been on full blast all night and all morning. Ugh... I can't stand the sound of bass blasting like that. It could just be that their TV is right against the wall and they have some kind of sound system that they've turned the bass up on. Either way... annoying. Really detracts from the Spirit when you're trying to read your scriptures...

Anyway. EFY. Awesome. I love working with the youth of the Church. Even if I don't get any sleep and my co-counselor acts like a 5-year old more than half the time.

June 5-11: Red Team - 14 & 15 year olds
Last year I loved the 14 & 15 year age group. Loved them! They were so innocent and excited to be at EFY. It seemed like there were little to no modesty issues and they tried as hard as they could to be obedient and feel the Spirit. What happened in just 1 year? Don't get me wrong. I loved my girls. Even the ones I struggled with a little more.

This year I decided to just give them their agency instead of trying to control every little thing. I have a bit of a control issue... so being relaxed was not easy. I wasn't relaxed about the rules. Rules are rules after all. But I didn't try to keep such a tight leash. It worked really well with the 16 & 17 year old girls the previous week.

I also have to say I had great cos again. Derek and Krista were awesome and their kids loved them. It took me a while to figure them out, and they seemed to click a lot more than I did. But that's how it usually goes with me. I'm usually the odd man out. By the end of the week though, we really got it. I didn't feel left out at all. (This year I also tried really hard to keep the mindset that this whole thing is not about me in the least.)

Pretty early in the week, one of my girls approached me saying she really didn't know if the Church was true, but that she really wanted to gain her own testimony. First off, I was impressed that she had that much desire at her age. Second, I felt very blessed that she and the Lord would trust me enough to help. So we talked for a while and we talked about how to find answers, prayer, faith, etc. Really just the basics. The next morning she told me she started reading her scriptures and praying intently. You could immediately see a change in her countenance. She was excited and happy. It was awesome! Friday night after devotional, she waited for all the rest of the girls to get to their rooms so she could talk to me alone. She told me that this week she realized that she really did have a testimony. She didn't think she did before and if she did, it didn't matter. But now she knew. I told her to call her parents that night to tell them about the experience. (What parent wouldn't want to hear about their child discovering their testimony? And on top of that, families don't talk to each other about spiritual things anymore...) You could tell that she was excited to talk to them about it. This experience (along with a few other small experiences) really made the whole week worth while.

We also had a few girls that were... reckless. They had no sense of propriety and no consideration for others. I hope that they learned something. I really, really hope, because it sure didn't seem like it when they left. It all started with this boy with a duck tail. Just a little bit of hair at the neck that curls up and looks like a duck tail. I'll tell you, I like it MUCH better than the ugly Jedi braid boys are growing behind the ear. But at EFY, boys are expected to maintain the dress and grooming standards, including hairstyles. That means to get into EFY, they have to cut it off. And this boy cut off enough of his duck tail to get him into EFY, though some of it remained.

He was teased a lot about it by these girls, but he was obedient in cutting off the required amount. So Friday morning (of course it was the last day) during the morning devotional, these girls plotted together, sat behind this boy, and decided to take it upon themselves to cut the rest of the duck tail for him. Okay, in order to understand the full gravity of this seemingly small and stupid act, you have to know that this boy lived in New Zealand for a while where the duck tail was a style and was how he identified himself with that country. He's also a football player and it stuck out of the back of his helmet so people could identify him. No matter my personal feelings on the duck tail, it was something that was important to him. There are also 5 rules at EFY that if you break them, you WILL get sent home. One of which is causing anyone physical, spiritual, or emotional harm. While boys don't like to think of themselves capable of emotional harm... this sure did it. That boy was about ready to hurt someone. And we didn't want that either.

The boy got over it. Not really, but enough to not want to beat someone. The girls felt bad when it came to the boy being upset. Once he calmed down, they seemed fine. The problem is, when you do something at EFY, pretty much everyone and their dog has to get involved. Even after taking these girls aside and speaking to them, informing them of the severity of their actions, they seemed to have little to no remorse for doing something wrong. Fortunately, they weren't sent home. I almost wish they were so they could understand that you cannot take it upon yourself to take away the agency of another. Frustrating. It was dumb. Just so dumb. I wish we didn't have to leave EFY on that note.

For our Friday night company devotional, we also only had 20 minutes. We usually get at least 40. I spent my 5 - 7 minutes talking about proper choices, getting to the temple, and eternal families. I called them out too. Not by name. But I told them that I was concerned that some of them weren't getting it. That they didn't realize that the Gospel applies to them too. They are not immune. And they are not excluded. I sure hope they figure it out. And fast. Before they make really stupid mistakes that they can't take back.

And I really hope that one of my other boys, suffering from what seemed like a neurological problem, is okay. He's such a good kid and I hope his dad's pride doesn't prevent him from taking care of himself and growing the way he needs to.

Uh... would you be offended if I wrote about last week a little later. Mike is coming over to help with my car. Hopefully we can get it towed to a shop and figure out what's wrong with it... :)

New York, New York

And another one bites the dust.

WARNING: This blog post contains personal views on politics and religion.
Read at your own risk.

New York just passed same-sex marriage. It's legal now.

Let me start by saying, while I don't approve of same-sex just-about-anything, I do believe that if that is your lifestyle, your choice, if your partner is the only family that you have, yes, they should have some of the same rights, like claims to the life insurance policy of your partner you've been with for 20+ years. There has been much debate on this over the past several years and a lot of wrongs have been committed on both sides.

Let me also say that I have had many relationships where I love the person, but not always their actions. Yes, I love my gay and lesbian friends. They are good people. Some of them are good, God-fearing people. But let me also say that I am a little sad for them because I know they can't enjoy all the same blessings that I may or may not have the opportunity to enjoy.

Let me tell you what I know:

I know marriage is between a man and a woman, ordained by God, just like it was in the beginning with Adam and Eve.
I know that sex before marriage is, in fact, a sin (gay or straight).
I know that God's plan for us centers around families. True families. Families that last beyond the grave.
I know that God gives all His children the same opportunities, but we have to choose them.
I know that some of us have challenges in this life that seem impossible to overcome, but I also know that through Christ, ALL things are possible.
I know that God wants to bless His children for their obedience to His commandments, but again, we have to choose to keep His commandments in order to receive the blessings predicated upon our obedience.
I know God loves ALL of His children and wants the best for us.

I do not believe, now that same-sex marriage is legal in a few states, that it is right. Everyone has their agency, their freedom to choose. I know that not everyone believes the same things about religion, morals, etc., as me. Do I want everyone to have the same opportunities for happiness as me? Yes. But I also know that true, lasting, eternal happiness only comes from living the principles of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. That disobedience, no matter how society twists it to look "right", never leads to that kind of happiness.

I am happy for those who feel a great sense of relief and success over this law being passed, but I'm also sad for them because they just don't know what I know. They haven't felt what I have felt. They haven't seen what I have seen.

The fullness of the Gospel is on the earth today, and there are so many who just don't know it.

Marriage is not just a temporal matter. It is a spiritual matter. What is bound here on earth by God's proper Priesthood authority is bound in heaven.

Got To Be Starting Something

Begin a week straight of cleaning, organizing, and wedding prep.

Okay, okay, I still need to finish blogging about EFY. I will. Just not this very second.

What have I been doing with my week of no work/no school/no fiance/no roommates?

Watching a lot of the news. No joke. How many different angles can you take on the Little Cottonwood Canyon River flooding? Well, a new one for each of the 3 or 4 broadcasts every day. Or a man being drowned while mowing a lawn. Not a happy thing.

I've also been doing a lot of crafting. I made a chalkboard, which turned out very cute. I won't post a picture of it because it's for the wedding. I heard that one of the biggest mistakes couple make when planning a wedding is that they never make it "them". They spend all this money on food, flowers, venues, but never add the little details that make it theirs. Well not us! Our wedding will be us. If you come to the reception, you'll get to see a couple things that I've made and a BEAUTIFUL picture of the Oquirrh Mountain Temple that Cory made for me. He gave it to me on Sunday and it's sitting in our apartment. I am still in awe of the talent that my man has. And I'm so grateful that he has decided to share it with me.
Granted, there's only so much we can do to make this reception "us" in a venue, but we're doing our best.

For those planning to attend, wear your dancing shoes, because we're going to dance.
We are not having a formal line, so if you want to visit with us, come, dance with us, and we'll be sure to get around to all the tables.

Also, cake is being served at 7:30 - red velvet, carrot, and marble with various fillings. It's going to be delicious!

Since having to move out of our "perfect" apartment so abruptly last month, and not knowing whether we could stay in this new place, I didn't really start unpacking yet. Not to mention I've worked 3 weeks straight of EFY and didn't have time to bother with it until now. We're thinking we might be able to stay here, so I started organizing/unpacking. I've been trying to purge again so there's actually room for Cory and his stuff. I'm concerned. I think I have too much stuff. I'm trying to get rid of what we don't need, but so much of it has so many memories. I'm doing my best. I'm sure he'll understand too. As long as we have room for him and his things.

Ashley left me on Wednesday. I miss her. She really has been such a great roommate. I've been really lucky with roommates. I'm sure Cory will be a pretty good roommate too. And Cory is in Yellowstone with his family celebrating Gma and Gpa Parker's 50th wedding anniversary. I decided that I shouldn't go because I needed the time to get wedding stuff finished up. I was also a little paranoid about getting sick/bitten/eaten/poisoned/squashed/in a car accident. My folks said I should go home for the week, but unfortunately, I have absolutely no money to put into my gas tank to get there. All the money I do have has been going to wedding things. Back to the original topic of this paragraph, I am alone. However, Cory comes back tomorrow, and Kayla should be here on Sunday. So I'll get Cory and Kayla. (That sounds a little familiar...)

In other news, John Huntsman for President?! Count me in!

PS. I killed a fly today.

Well, that's the update. 7 days remaining. We are definitely getting hitched!

Oh, and can I say that I am so grateful to all of my family for the sacrifices that they have and are making for me and this wedding? I love you all so much!